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Sunday, November 20, 2005

Come to India! A Billion People Can't Be Wrong!

The people around here were very civilized (or atleast thats what the ancient books say). Eventually we got bored of it. We have a rich cultural heritage, but it doesn't really matter because it is quickly being displaced by the more marketed "One Fits All" "American Culture"

The Europeans saw India and decided they wanted it. After a lot of whining and fighting, one very old bald man decided that we must not fight for independence. That will confuse the British! :D This worked. The British Government got confused and left.

As of April 1st 2003, the number of people in India has exceeded the number of gods that are prayed to! But not to worry - this absurd situation is being remedied by inventing exciting new religions and gods. Some proposed gods are: All members of the infamous "Nehru-Gandhi" family, Amitabh Bachchan (sic, coz i dont give a damn) and Rahul Dravid.

Hindi flicks are known for having no storyline, bad acting and random totally unrelated music videos! :P The plots are usualy revealed in the first 15 seconds. Making an average movie takes about 1 day, which is also approximately how long a movie plays for.

Half the country lives under the poverty line in utter misery. The other half lives above the poverty line in utter misery.

Classical Indian singers cover their ears as they sing/wail.. yup thats right.. they can't stand to hear themselves "sing"!

Some Facts about India:
* Traffic moves on neither side of the road.
* The most important Indian politician is Laloo Prasad Yadav the dictator of Bihar
* All bus terminals, train terminals and airports in most cities have the same name. (eg: Chhatrapati Shivaji Terminus)
* The most worshipped God in India goes by the name of "Sachin Tendulkar".
* Magic Carpets exist but are legal only in areas without any airports.

This article was inspired by my T-shirt with the same title :)

7 comments:

iamathogwart said...

just a thot...eat shit, a million flies cant be wrong :D

SD said...

:P

Anonymous said...

sadistic bastard u... dont even have gud humor x(

SD said...

uh... dude take it easy...

ken said...

i would have enjoyed the post more if u hadn't mentioned douglas adams.. :D
i mean comeon!

SD said...

accha.. so ur saying that I can't write like him huh?

We'll I'll get there someday :P

ken said...

yes
:)