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Monday, March 20, 2006

Cricket

"I just wanted to find out who we were playing."
~ Warwick Armstrong, Austrailan Test captain, seen reading a newspaper while fielding in the deep.

Cricket is India's National Timewasting Activity. And, man, is it good at wasting time or what? No other activity (with the exception of sewing) comes even close. And while fanatics and zealots claim otherwise, it remains true that - "Cricket is a game, which the British, not being spiritual people, had to to invent in order to have some concept of eternity." (A wise man indeed said this!)

Just the other day, a friend of mine went to watch the India vs England match, An English batsman hit the ball very hard indeed. Up and up the ball went, and then at the top it seemed to hang motionless in the air, poised like a hawk, fighting, it seemed, a heroic but fruitless battle against the chief invention of Sir Isaac Newton. Finally it landed right into his sleepy palms. He was ecstatic! Now why anyone would spend an entire day, shouting themselves hoarse, in the sweltering heat, watching ants move around and getting dehydrated in the process is beyond me. And to celebrate after going through all that? That's just plain loony!

What is cricket? Organised loafing. That's what it is.

A century? Yeah.. that's the length of a test match.

As for me, I do not play cricket because it requires me to assume such indecent postures.

PS: Don't kill me Kris!

17 comments:

shashi said...

read the uncyclopedia article on cricket. you'll find out about plenty other reasons to not play cricket. :D

saint nothing! said...

haha.. funny.. well.. BTW.. dint know that gravity was Newton's "invention" :D!!!

well.. abt the indecent postures.. true maan! realy awkward styles.. :P.. why cant ppl play like guran in lagaaan! :P.. just an idea..

jokes apart, even i feel cricket is lame and boring.. i used to watch cricket matches till 12th just to escape studyin.. nuthing cud waste more time.. :).. football and basketball and badminton definately feel better maan!

Anonymous said...

hurr mkc :P

SD said...

ah! that was Kris right there! Am I right?

:P

Anonymous said...

I hear ya man. Supported and seconded.
Rylan

GrasshopperBoy said...

interesting thoughts...
btw, did u mean "knitting" instead of "sewing"???

SD said...

uh.. yeah i kinda did, but not exactly: knitting is not exactly what I had in mind. both are close enough.

@Rylan - :D

@Shashi - I read the entry... it's not that funny.. i think i'll edit and improve it. :)

Nikhil said...

This is the reason why Mumbai is not producing enough good cricketers off late, don't you think Kris? Even localites are making fun of this game :D

Indecent postures?? I watched women's tennis before I switched to soft porn :P

saint nothing! said...

@nikhil.. then where did ya go to after that??? ladies cricket?! :P

saint nothing! said...

hey maan! Kundu sir was talkin today abt the whole IIT student attitude stuff n all.. abt whats goin wrong here n all.. u missed the class maan! :) he was also telling abt some research done on student happiness in diff IITs by Prof. Tanmay(psycho!) that appeared in mumbai mirror apparently! wanna blog? or shd i?

Nikhil said...

@mallu.. Women's cricket?? For God's sake the only people who would be stimulated/stirred by that would be Afghanis under Taliban. It would have been a step back for me!
I followed a simple math equation: 2x+x=3x :P

PS:Sorry SD :)

SD said...

hahhah! lol@nikhil!

Yeah mallu.. you go ahead and blog. I'm reading this a day late (was involved in PAF)

i read the arti in Mumbai Mirror today. Shady reasons re...

saint nothing! said...

LOL nikhil. .true! :D

sd, read my new one.. on nothing less that Love!

shrek said...

ahh if kris doesnt kill you, I will for sure. Grrrr...

SD said...

lol!

I ain't scared of ya! :P

GrasshopperBoy said...

linking u on my site :)

Kris said...

dont worry...this kris won't kill you...i think cricket is boring too...unless you have an unread newspaper handy :P